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Vol 134, 12-19-02 - The 'REAL' Womans Dictionary by MRS Webster
Let's get ready for the week with a few great new Pictures and Humorous articles. Get ready to jump into something Strange!
Check out the Home Page and also the New Pix of the Week: http://www.strangecosmos.com/index.html
QUOTES & TOASTS of the DAY - A FEW CELEBRITY QUOTES
"Her hair lounges on her shoulders like an anesthetized cocker spaniel".- - - Henry Allen (about Lauren Bacall, 1994)
"It's a new low for actresses when you have to wonder what's between her ears instead of her legs."- - - Katherine Hepburn (about Sharon Stone)
"Not in this lifetime. Why? Because I'm the only one she hasn't done it to."- - - Sharon Stone (when told Madonna has said she wants to kiss her)
"She's like an apple turnover that got crushed in a grocery bag on a hot day."- - - Camille Paglia (about Drew Barrymore)
"A great actress, from the waist down."- - - Dame Margaret Kendal (about Sarah Bernhardt)
Today's Humour: - 11 Key Words - The "REAL" Woman's Dictionary by Mrs. Webster
1. "Fine" This is the word women use at the end of any argument when they feel they are right but can't stand to hear you argue any longer. It means that you should shut up. (NEVER use "fine" to describe how she looks.
This will cause you to have one of those arguments.)
2. "Five minutes" This is half an hour. It is equivalent to the five minutes that your Football game is going to last before you take out the trash, so women feel that it's an even trade.
3. "Nothing" "Nothing" means something and you should be on your toes. "Nothing" is usually used to describe the feeling a woman has of wanting to turn you inside out, upside down, and backwards. "Nothing" usually signifies an argument that will last "Five Minutes" and end with the word "Fine."
4. "Go Ahead" (with raised eyebrows) This is NOT permission; it's a dare! If you mistake it for permission, the result will be the woman will get upset over "Nothing" and you'll have a "Five Minute" discussion that will end with the word "Fine."
Click for All 11 : http://www.strangecosmos.com/read.adp?joke_id=2947
MOST POPULAR - HUMOUR - NEWS - PICTURES
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Michael Jackson's Next Surgery: http://www.strangecosmos.com/view.adp?picture_id=7518
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These 'Skinny' Gals Make Ali McBeal Look FAT: http://www.strangecosmos.com/view.adp?picture_id=7481
The 'Peace Dove's' From Hollywood getting OLD: http://www.strangecosmos.com/view.adp?picture_id=7520
The 2 Featured Picture Categories this week: Misc - Goofy - Strange - Different - Silly
http://www.strangecosmos.com/jokes/pictures_category_view.adp?picture_category_id=8
The Top News Articles & Humor for the week:
Important People Explain Why Chicken Crossed the Road: http://www.strangecosmos.com/read.adp?joke_id=3649
Strange Actual Newspaper Headlines: http://www.strangecosmos.com/read.adp?joke_id=3672
Disney Stories - The Adult Version: http://www.strangecosmos.com/read.adp?joke_id=3678
Christmas Poem For Our Soldiers: http://www.strangecosmos.com/read.adp?joke_id=3681
The Featured News & Humor Category this week: Blondes - Male - Females - Others?
http://www.strangecosmos.com/jokes/jokes_category_view.adp?joke_category_id=18
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