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AIRPORT SECURITY REGULATIONS TESTED
AIRPORT SECURITY REGULATIONS TESTED: by: G. Marnier - SatireNewsService In ascertaining how the color coded national terrorism warning system should apply to airport security, a test was undertaken at Dulles International Airport and officials were stunned and at how readily a group of passengers who were checking in for a flight to a Democratic National Committee sponsored meeting of young voters, reacted to the test. Annie Nudie, spokeswoman for the group, said that although she was violently opposed to the war in Iraq which had prompted formation of the warning system, she was glad the test was undertaken in August when the temperature was 99 degrees. When reminded that those running the test had only intended to check baggage and clothed passengers, Nudie said "It goes to show you how stupid these Republican war mongers are. Do they think this would work in the middle of winter?" One of the police officers who had surrounded the group, told Nudie that although Dulles has a very large waiting area inside the building, if she and her fellow idiots were dumb enough to try this again in cold weather, they would be moved outside and would have to take the consequences. When Nudie and her friends started shouting that their freedom of expression was being violated and if the police touched them, they would be charged with sexual harassment, the fire trucks moved in and thoroughly soaked both the passengers and their belongings. After hurriedly putting on their wet clothes and heading for their gate, the airline refused to allow them to board, claiming their behavior could create a volatile situation for the crew and other passengers. 
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